Your Kid’s Not Going Pro

A Youth Sports Blog

Drunks 4 (hic) Sports

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Between this and Michael Kinahan, the fine folks at the Patriot-Ledger in Quincy, Mass., are having all the youth sports fun. The headline reads: “Weymouth schools looking at fundraising in front of liquor stores.”

What a great idea! The liquor store in my neighborhood is jam-packed every day, thanks to low prices and great selection (thanks for stocking Chimay, Three Floyds and Great Lakes!). I’m sure the people carting out five cases of cognac at a time or enough Lite to stock Soldier Field have a little walking-around money they can stick in a kid’s bucket, particularly because my store only takes cash. Given the lines of people waiting to park, the kids could go car to car. Brilliant idea, Weymouth schools!

Oh, wait a minute: the story is about Weymouth possibly NOT wanting to have kids panhandle in front of liquor stores.

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Go pull some money out of their Bunghole, kids. (This is the real name of a real Boston-area liquor store.)

From the Patriot-Ledger:

[A] school committee is reviewing a proposed policy change that would ban students from collecting spare change outside package stores. The proposal was made by Weymouth’s substance abuse prevention team, which helps administer a federal Drug Free Communities grant.

Marilyn Frano, Weymouth’s substance abuse prevention coordinator, said she came up with the idea after she heard that Weymouth High School athletes were asked to collect change – a practice known as “canning” – outside liquor stores on Super Bowl Sunday to take advantage the high volume of business on that day.

Frano said the proposal is part of the town’s push to dissociate drinking and celebration. Frano said she has reached agreements with several fraternal organizations in town that say they will not serve alcohol during youth banquets.

She likened such changes to those that eventually contributed to marked declines in smoking.

I’m sure Marilyn Frano’s heart is in the right place, though I think the recession is doing the job of disassociating drinking from celebration. But, man, when youth sports are apparently hurting for money like everybody else, what’s with all these people who want to cut off fundraising from their most popular sources? Do you want morals, or a ballfield without ruts?

Speaking of smoking, here’s a fundraising idea. If you don’t like children standing in front of liquor stores, have them stand outside of office buildings and restaurants (depending on your state’s indoor smoking law) to shake down the nicotine addicts cast outside. The beauty is, you’ll have more than a fleeting moment to make your pitch. Eventually you’ll get something because no one can be so callous after standing out for so long with a kid pitching for a good cause. You might want to excuse the asthmatic kids from that gig, however.

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